mornin y'all

or afternoon....

or evening for that matter....

Hello lovely people EVERYWHERE!!!

I'll cut straight to the recovery talk because im feeling pretty positive today :-) i had a good therapy appt yest and im certain i can get myself back on track *im making strides already* in order to catch up from my little holiday blip... (pics from the hols WILL come abit later on... but read on peeps, we'll get there! :-p)

So i was nervous yest, of course i was.... i knew i would most likely have lost over the 2weeks since my last appt. and i had. not a MAJOR amount, but enough to make me think. I realised over the time away that this is a battle that is not going to go away or get any easier unless i put in the effort required to fight it. I have so much to gain before i even reach the normal range BMI, so what am i afraid of?? we talked thru some of the things that were potentially holding me back and tried to break them down... the more we talked, the more i started to think, these are some pretty dumb reasons!!! i could give myself a reason why they were irrational on pretty much every account, so that helped me to gain some perspective and im going to write these down on notecards so when im feeling irrational and one of them is triggering me, ill flip it over and see my rational response on the other side to remind me why it is the ED talking, not my true mind.... Good idea?!? i hope so!

Have any of you done any similar motivational things in recovery?

did they help you when you had negative thoughts?

Anyway, it was really nice to feel like i was getting back on track, to be honest... the holiday, altho it was lovely and sunny and nice and all. i felt quite unhappy, like i was trapped behind a door, i could hear people behind the door having a good time, but the door was locked and i couldnt get through to join them.... i dont want to have my door locked anymore, i want the KEY!!!! i wanna have fun too and be one of those people laughing and enjoying themselves. dont i deserve that too??

So today i have another appt, this time with a self-help group for ED sufferers... im getting assessed today with the intention of joining their closed group sessions that they hold once a week. i dont know how long ill be able to go for, since i start back at work in 3weeks, but i figure its worth giving it a try anyway... im open to as much help as i can get! i think it'll benefit me to be able to talk to other people going thru the same things aswell, ive already found so much strength and insight from you bloggers out there, i honestly dont think i would have gotten this far without you guys! so if its anything like that, then it can only be a good thing :-)

I will let you know how that goes doooown. but now for some piccies!!

The Villa & Pool...

Olde frenchy village, high up in the hills... so pretty!

Oh my gaaad, the view was AMAZE....

"If you take my place, you take my handicap!"

so appropriate dontcha think?!?

We stopped in a little gallery/shop and these caught my eye...

...And they might just give you a hint as to what the next installment of my "french adventure" holds...!

Any ideas?!? hehehe.

xxx