ooooof

Well DAMN you guys, my body aches today!!!

I cant quite believe that that one little yoga class could make my body ache...! i mean, it was mainly just stretching and breathing?! but since i didnt do anything else of note this weekend (unless cheering the horsies on at the pub screen counts? hmm, methinks not) i guess it mustve been all that downward dogging... HAHAHAHAHAHA. ive got a dirty mind, cant help it :p

Anyways, im not complaining... i like it. i like to feel my body. thats old news... but this is different, cos i know that its not a negative feeling, like im used to... the times when i feel connected to my body are the times when ive pushed it too far. When its exhausted and fatigued and ready to drop. And thats not a nice feeling :( but it used to be the only way i could get that connection..... 

ill admit, i do still chase after that "high" sometimes, that rush when ive walked and walked and my legs feel like lead and im all wobbly and all i can do is flop on my bed and wonder why the hell i do that to myself. but luckily its less often nowadays - cos ive learned the hard (and painful) way, that it doesnt help me in the long run... all it does is bring me guilt and stress and really, it doesnt actually achieve much anyways! so there really is no point! i do still use walking as a way to de-stress, to clear my head and unwind. I know it is still a "coping mechanism" but its not so disoredered that other people dont chose to get some fresh air to think over their shit.. its just that maybe i take it to an extreme. where normal non-disordered people wouldnt. But yeah, i still walk... but (and its a big but!) i know that i can stop when i get tired, i dont HAVE to carry on...  and anyways, its much nicer to walk at a slower pace... you get to see much more when it doesnt just whizz by you in a haze! :)

Sooo, today wasnt as sunny as this weekend has been, but i guess thats a monday thing... its never as nice on a monday as it is on the weekend! But since im still on holidays, it wasnt too painful! ha! 

what WAS painful tho, was this really weird dream i had, just as i was waking up this morning... i dreamt that my eyes were like infected or something and i had skin growing over them. Urghh, it was horrible!!! i felt like my eyes were trying to open but they couldn't cos something was growing over them. EEEW, right?! Im thinking horror film plot-line, right there!!! Luckily, when i got my lazy ass up and into the bathroom to wash my face, i saw that thankfully... my eyes were fine :)

me & my active imagination eh?! 

haha.

After that little scare-fest i got some work bits together here and headed into school to get stuff done with my teacher friend. Its always more fun doing work with another person... and its true what they say, a teachers work is never done!!! Some people may moan that we teachers get such long holidays etc, but believe me... alot of it is spent marking and planning for the next term! Its by no means just spent sitting about relaxing! (sadface)

But... it will be soon!!! 

I cant wait till this summer holidays, when i wont have ANY school work to do... it'll be free and easy... summer living y'all!! Altho saying that, i do have to start looking for some kindof part-time holiday work, since ill still be paying rent and living costs aswell as saving for travelling - all without my usual salary. OH crap! Still, ill cross that bridge when i get to it... cos for now, i have nails to paint!

Umm, what was that i said about never being able to stop and relax?!? haha.... well i am an ART teacher - so this is all part of the job!!