hello again

Hi guys... sorry for the rant yesterday. I know it was abit full-on, but sometimes youve just gotta get this stuff off your chest right?! 

Anyways, i feel alot better today. im a creature of positivity... like a unicorn, or a leprechaun or summat! yeah, i like to think upwards instead of wallowing in the blues. Sooo, today is a new day. another day. a MONday :-p

Not just any old monday either, it was my CPA review with the big boss therapist dude this afternoon. I had to programme a reminder in my phone so that i didnt just head straight hone after work, it was VERY weird going down to the unit at 4pm tho... i got there just as everyone else was leaving so it definitely felt like abit of a backwards day!

The review went well i think. I mean we'd already discussed some of it last week and i knew that if i was allowed i wanted to continue coming to the unit so that i had accountability over the holidays. He has allowed me to keep my reduced days and has even said (after i begged!!!) to let me have a few weeks off for holiday time :-) which was decent of him... cos technically i could be there full time once school is out... and i havent really shown him much to go on yet. But im determined more than ever... im in a MUCH better place than last year and i reaaaaallly want to go to America and do all the fun things i couldnt do before and enjoy myself!!! So that sounds great right?! But how am i going to impose that??? Well obviously theres gonna be a "BUT" (and its a big but) there is a condition. Which is that I must meet a set weight target by my next review in just over a months time. EEKs! but no fear, its cool. i knew there were gonna be conditions. and im ok with that...! cos im asking quite alot in terms of trust in me. Really they could discharge me right now, considering that i havent been consistently gaining in accordance with their 0.5 kg a week rule and yet ive still reduced my days (god bless work!) But for once, he has given me the benefit of the doubt! Also because everyone there has vouched for the fact that i AM trying and its not entirely my fault that i have had weight fluctuations... So yippee!! summer is ON.

Ok, so heres the dealio.... i will attend the unit on my usual 2days per week (tues and thurs) until i go away on holiday. THEN when i return he will asses my condition and decide whether i need to a) return to the unit full-time for the remainder of the holidays or b) continue on my 2days as i am if needed, OR if they really think im wasting their time... c) they discharge me. as in thanks for coming... but basically, SEEYA, wouldnt wanna be ya

Tough love eh?!

I can work with that 

:-p

So thats about the size of it. I can stay for now, but i MUST show willing to get my MP up to full and cut the activity or im out. simple as that. And it really does sound simple. Thats the tricky part. Cos everything i have to do, is exactly what i want to do!!! But i imagine the ED side of me will have some issues with that! So now what i have to do is make my head co-operate and get this show on the road....

Other than that, my new graze box comes tomo... SUPER EXCITED!!!! its like christmas in a handy delivery snack-time once a week. whats not to love?!