With Eyes Closed I Look Closer: sadface

Awww, the mumatron has gone back to the UK and i iz saaaaad :(

and its rainy which makes it sadder

(altho how cool is that cloud!?!)

Im actually pretty amazed at the reaction i had when she left, i was proper gutted. like tears and stuff! Usually im pretty ok with goodbyes, probs cos i think anorexia numbs my emotions alot of the time so its all abit BLAH and haaaazzzy. But honestly, it felt like someone had pulled off my arm and thrown it across the ocean!! Ok, maybe thats abit extreme, but for reals - you wouldnt have wanted to hang out with me on wednesday morning, i was a hot mess! :p

I think it was partly cos we had literally spent EVERY day together (pretty much every minute in fact, since we were sharing a room and mum had no phone so couldnt really go anywhere on her own..) So unless you count trips to the loo, we were basically together 24/7! And when you spend that much time with someone, it DOES feel weird when suddenly they're gone... and it was even more disorientating, cos mum had to leave at 2am in the morning to catch her flight, so when i went to sleep - she was there - then when i woke up - she was gone. Ohmygod it was horrible!!! all her stuff was gone and the apartment we'd rented was all empty and quiet and weird!!! Soooo it was defs a good thing that id booked to move into a shared apartment that very day.. it meant i had to get out and get moving - which i did and maaaan was that better. A new place, sharing with some cool people. SORTED!

Anyways, as ever i have rushed to the end without giving you a peek into the before!

Soooo, last time i posted the mothership had arrived and we'd spent some time by the beach before moving to Melbourne. WELL, we moved to stay with my mums friend who also deals in vintage clothes, but my GOD does she collect alot of junk!!! she was the loveliest lady ever, totally quirky and off in her own world but her house was like a treasure trove for hoarders! After a while we got used to having to climb over piles of clothes and stuff and it was actually a pretty fun place to stay... kindof like an adventure playground! and it was a good location cos we were close to the city but not IN it... we caught a tram into the city most days and had fun looking around galleries and having lunch in cute cafes, generally touristing it up until we headed over to Sydney.

street-art hunting became my "thang"...

a keith haring artwork - LOVE!

Now i love sydney, but after spending 5months working and living in a not-so-perfect environment at my last place... i was ready to embrace all that this amazing city has to offer while NOT stressing about work and flatmate stuff. So we decided that if i was gonna show mum sydney in a chilled, relaxed, AUSSIE way... we should be by the beach. and what better beach in australia (or the world!) but the famous Bondi Beach. hells yeaaaah :)

living by the beach is bonza mate

So we went online and found our first place, which was a shared apartment, through this airbnb site (which by the way, is a FAB way to find places to stay... apparently its worldwide too. Winner!) We were staying in an aussie guys apartment, literally crawling distance from the beach! it was perfect location, right next to all the shops and cool cafes/bars and he was a great host... Buuuut theres something about being in someone else's place that can be a little difficult, not that he was hard to be around - he was at work so not there during the day, but sometimes we felt bad for being in his way in the evenings when we wanted to chill after a days sightseeing, so after our initial couple of days booking, we decided to move into a sole apartment, so we could have it just to ourselves. It was a little pricier but not too much cos it was literally a one room studio.. so that was better, cos we could come and go as we pleased and it was perfect to have somewhere to relax at night... we'd eaten out alot already, so it was nice to cook some meals in the comfort of your own place!

its safe to say we sampled the local cuisine!

And sooo, thats where we stayed until mum left... Aww. sadface again :( I miss my mumatron... it was SO nice to spend time with her away from the shit that goes on back home. I am so lucky to have this little stunner as my mum!

Seriously tho, I wish she'd had more time here, 3weeks in Oz is no way enough time... we didnt get to do half the things we wanted to! Australia is a BIG country, i mean ive been here 6months and i still havent really done that much. Ive only travelled to Brisbane, Melbourne, the Dandenongs and Sydney... Which is why im starting to think about what my next adventure might be... i feel like its time to move on from sydney now. Especially since its coming into winter and so i might aswell travel around and check out some of the sunnier northern regions! I have a nanny job booked for two weeks in april and so hopefully that will give me some thinking time (oh and in case you're interested... ITS MY BIRTHDAY NEXT WEEK!!!!) haha, im such a bday person. i freakin love 'em! it doesnt even matter if its not mine-ill still get excited about it!! Anyways, thats the update as to now... i will post again when ive moved into the nanny place next week as im hoping ill have more time to blog, after ive dropped the kid at school - the day is MINE surely!?! (well till 3pm...) Haha :p

Anyhoo, i dont know if anyone is actually still reading this blog - as i guess ive been pretty inconsistent with posts! but hey, if you ARE still there... hellooooo! and i hope you are all good and enjoying my strange australian adventure as much as i am. its definitely a lesson in progress and self-development. But i think its doing me good! (i will update ED stuff in the next post too, as there is lots of ups and downs and round and rounds to discuss) but on the whole - im doing OK. ive gained some weight, learnt to slow down abit (kinda) and appreciate life. Its not all smooth sailing, i still struggle with eating when im not hungry and being less active, but im working on it. having my mum here was a big eye-opener... i never thought the amount of walking i did was THAT much, sure, the times id push it too far and id feel tired and weak i knew it was ED driven... but having cut back to just casual strolling from here to there, that was still more than she'd do! she literally wanted to take the bus everywhere and she STILL ate all her meals and a few cheeky treats too! So i guess i still have some work to do... which is fine, cos im no quitter!